@StephenAtHome: Netflix is raising its monthly rates?! Man, whoever's password I'm using has got to be pissed.
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@mommy_cusses: Motherhood is when your child looks like a sparkling cherub and you look like a steaming pile of nope.
@iwearaonesie: wife: know what today is? me: yep wife: on 2 together: 1, 2 wife: Happy Anniver.. me: 3 MONTHS UNTIL.. wife:..sary me: wife: me: ..Santa
@ItsAndyRyan: Producer: Any ideas? Bruce Willis: There are 4 elements, right? Producer: Go on... Bruce: What if there was a FIFTH element Producer: Great! What else? Bruce: You know there are five senses... Half an hour later Bruce: So what if there TWELVE monkeys?