@DarlingNikki_12: Never go to target in a red shirt. I was holding my kid and someone asked for help. Like yea just let me finish stocking the toddlers first.
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@jjhartinger: This new generation doesn't knock they just text to say they're outside, so I text back to say we're inside. Two can play.
@InternetHippo: SCIENTISTS: We've discovered a massive black hole with no obvious qualities ME: Ok wow I'm right here
@Metalligretch: Yelling "wooooo" when the singer says the name of your town is what separates us from the animals.