@DaddyJew: Never trust a vegetarian who eats animal crackers
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@DepecheALAmode: Moths are really just butterflies on meth, all angry and shit while head-butting light bulbs and biting holes in your favorite shirt.
@SteveKoehler22: She gets stoked after reading: "Big strapping boxer" on dating site But soon discovers he's a 475 lb. guy working in shipping at Amazon.
@AimeeHelene1: Wanted to respond with "Perfect!" but accidentally sent "Pervert!" That's my cue to leave. And sorry, Steve, you're probably not a pervert.
@DeeDeeSpeaks: STOP EDITING YOUR PICS, what if you go missing? How tf can we find you if you look like Beyonce on Instagram but Waka Flocka in real life?