@TheAlexNevil: Newton taught us that a body at rest will remain at rest, a body in motion will remain in motion, and that figs taste good in cookies.
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@TheCiscoKidder: After clipping my toddler's fingernails for over 2 years, I think I could diffuse a bomb while riding a roller coaster.
@Vanilla_cupcak: My doctor wasn't amused when he asked how much I weighed and I said One hundred and fat
@SaraMansford: My kid just put on an apron and made homemade brownies so forget the world, I'm not even the best mom in my house anymore.