@markleggett: Next month on the 13th, the date will be 13/13/13.
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@AristotlesNZ: Me: You put the "cow" in "coworker" Her: Excuse me?? Me: It's a joke format. Her: I'm telling HR.. Me: Ok but I doubt they'll get it either.
@InternetHippo: [genie emerges from his lamp] Master, what is thy— [he sees me on the bed pointing at the remote like 3ft away] Are u kidding me
@BigBec43: There was a spider in my bathroom so I threw the cat at it. The spider is dead but the cat's pretty pissed