@GrowlyGrego: Next time during church, stand up and ask your pastor "Have you ever turned down heroin?" Both Yes and No are equally entertaining answers.
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@NYC_Blonde: I want what any normal girl wants in life... A great job, a loving husband and to be the wallpaper on thousands of iPhones.
@jnrbtsn: The worst part about being single is always doing what I want. Anytime. Anywhere. With whomever. That sucks.
@ProdigyNelson: Bouncer: ID please Me: I got socks for Christmas Bouncer: …okay Me: and I'm genuinely happy about it Bouncer: so sorry come on in