@GrowlyGrego: Next time during church, stand up and ask your pastor "Have you ever turned down heroin?" Both Yes and No are equally entertaining answers.
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@Muaythaigirlie: Had a date planned for tonight but he got electrocuted at work. I'm serious The things men do to avoid hanging out with me is amazing.
@Modern_Psyche: Writing a good suicide note is hard, especially if you don't know that person's handwriting.
@BMcCarthy32: if one member of the motorcycle gang has to pee do they all stop or does he just have to catch back up?