@hippieswordfish: nice try walmart, like im gonna spend $20 on a skeleton mask when i could easily just peel the flesh and muscle off my face for free
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@pleatedjeans: [interviewing cave bat] me: any disadvantages to hanging upside down? Bat: [pee rolling down his face] Yes, one.
@Sassafrantz: Accidentally left my phone at home, now I know how Kevin McCallister's parents felt.