@NeinQuarterly: No, 2013, you were not the worst year. But thank you for trying.
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@PissAndry: These boots were made for walking, and that's just what they'll do. One of these day--oh goddamn it. Did you glue these to the floor, Carl?!
@rolldiggity: I fill my pockets with glitter so when people ask me for money, I can turn them out to show that I'm broke, but still a little fancy.