@tumblrstorytime: no chill in the bubble kingdom
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@ginzyj1983: People who automatically say it will get better without actually knowing what the problem is... is why there are bodies buried in my yard
@Maxine12339: Every time the grocery baggers ask if I want help to my car, I feel like telling them yes and climbing in the cart.
@ReeseButCallMeV: What phone etiquette?! You hand me your phone, you better believe I'ma hurry & scroll through as many pics as I can before you notice.
@iAmDelFreaky: I just opened an Easy Bake Oven restaurant. Please call your order in, 17 hours prior to your arrival.