@ThePocketJustin: No matter how often I scream METALLICA in the poolside DJ's face I don't think he's going to play them. Here come the police they'll help me
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@PoliUncorrect: * Pogoing Outside Your Window ~ Are... You... Sure... You... Don't... Want.... A... Second... Date?
@Reverend_Scott: Elmo: Oscar, why are you a grouch? Oscar: Growing up, my parents were- *stabs Elmo with broken beer bottle* CUZ I LIVE IN A TRASHCAN.
@SirEviscerate: ME (a ghost): You know how Bill Nye used to say "don't try this at home"? Well, I did, and he kicked in the door and shot me in the face.