@RocketRankoon: No mister movie ticket guy that's not a bag of cheetos in my jacket that's my enlarged heart for the love of cinema
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@Jake_Vig: The year is 2035. The only movies are superhero reboots. Anyone caught looking up from their phone is fined $100.
@ericacanrant: Looking for rich sugardaddy to support me so I can support my boyfriend so he can tweet more. *thoughtful romantic tweet*
@NoticablyBacon: The most confusing thing about living with a girl is how much hair they shed. How does her hair look so good? How isnt she bald?