@my_minivan_life: No thank you GPS.I have this magic ring on my left hand that connects me to the nice young lady in the passenger's seat who knows everything
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@StinkyGr33n: I carry one of those tiny Swiss Army knives with me at all times. You never know when you'll need a tiny blade to thwart an attacker.
@Reverend_Scott: OK THERE. DID I PASS YOUR STUPID SOBRIETY TEST YET? Cop: Sir, you're still laying on the ground where you fell down.
@NoticablyBacon: Me: lets go on a date Her: umm Me: what could go wrong *25 minutes later we are being chased by a pack of raccoons*