@AnOrangeSNES: Dear Abby, I never thought this would happen to me. Today I met a sexy woman who told me I write letters to the wrong publication.

@SammySkinns: "So You've Been Drinking and You Think You Can Dance?" That is definitely a reality show I would watch.

@AGStr8upNinja: Scientists say North America is going to sink into the ocean but we can change that. With a healthy diet and a little bit of exercise.

@Shut_up_Marissa: CW: How was your weekend? *finds nearest object* "Hello?" CW: Are you talking to a stapler? "I'm sorry, I have to take this."

@jonnysun: a person who loves cats is not a cat person theyre a dog person who loves cats. a cat person is sombody who is completley apathetic to cats