@Whateverfitsme: Not sure if my cooking skills have improved or taste buds have adapted.
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@TheHyyyype: COWORKER: turn that frown upside-down! ME: *rotates head 180 degrees along vertical axis as eyes go black and lights flicker* CW: uuhh...
@squirrel74wkgn: *drops off box to Salvation Army* "Sir, why is this box marked W I F E?" *peels out*
@cervixsmash: I like my women with curves. Lots and lots of curves. In a sort of spiral shape, maybe with ketchup. Curly fries. I like curly fries
@LizHackett: I attempted smoky eye makeup for a holiday party tonight, but instead it looks like I survived a bar fight, so I'm going with that story.