@bossy_boots99: Not to brag but both my kids are from the same dad
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@VanGobot: Judge: Guilty! *bangs gavel* NINE MONTHS LATER *gavel holding freaky gavel-human hybrid baby* Judge: *tears welling up* ..he has your eyes
@DanMentos: "Bob's here" Bob the surgeon or Bob who just pretends he's a surgeon? "We only know one Bob and he's an accountant" *arm falls off*
@ericbove: From now on when skinny girls say they're fat I'm just gonna be like, "Yup" & walk away.