@TheBoydP: Not to brag but I'm never late for work without a good reason. For example this week my boss is on vacation...
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@shanethevein: Funny how bullies only bully people who are susceptible to bullying. They don't bully people who'd throat punch em without thinking twice.
@freypalm: [comedy club] Worm: And what’s the deal with dandelion stems? Right? Right?! Other worms: *silence* Early bird: *cracking up*
@therealeatwood: If Trump dies in office he won’t even admit it. He’ll keep tweeting from the grave: “VERY dishonest coroner’s report says I died. Sad!”
@EJGomez: God: ok u can make one human that's it Satan: how do u feel about toupees & the name Donald