@jackiembouvier: I talk like a sailor in front of my kid. He's gonna swear anyway and I want him to be good at it.

@kelkulus: It's a good thing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles wore masks, or people might have recognized the 4 giant turtles at their day jobs.

@Thynebear: [Gets on one knee] Margaret- [Pulls out ring] Will you- will you please hide this, Gollum won't stop following me.

@polyhumorous: I got my husband to marry me 51 days after we met. Today is our 20th Anniversary and I think he's still wondering what the hell happened.

@alldrolledup: Body: All done? Brain: All done. Body: goodnight Brain: goodnight Body: Brain: Brain: Flintstone tiptoed a lot for a big dude