@Soberphobiccc: Nothing says I have faith in God like the bullet proof glass on the Pope's car.
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@Pierre__4: If I was a girl my best friend would have to come untangle me at least twice a week because I tried to take my bra off through my sleeve
@causticbob: My computer crashed and now all the other computers have slowed down so they can see what's happening.
@sixfootcandy: Librarian: Shhh! Me: Shh! Librarian: Shh! Me: Shh! Librarian: *glares at me* Me: Look lady, I can do this all day.
@heroinsdemise: What many don't know, "Riverdance" was invented while waiting in line at the ladies toilet.