@TheKenyan_: Now that 1 in every 3 people cheats in their relationships,I'm left wondering. . .Is it my wife or my girlfriend that's cheating?
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@GloriaFallon123: My daughter is such a happy little person she giggles in her sleep, which makes me worry that somehow she's not my biological offspring
@robdelaney: 23. RT @Highlights: Parents, at what age do you think it's okay for a child to get his or her own cell phone?
@hippieswordfish: *she leans in close* 'kyle, what's your wildest fantasy?' *i close my eyes and imagine opening a 10pc chicken nugget and finding 11 pieces*
@_SetTheHook_: I'm just gonna put an egg under my kid's pillows and tell them the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy must've went out drinking the night before.