@kashanacauley: Obama's gonna take all your decorative soaps.
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@RealLucasNeff: [The Bachelor] Some of you will be getting roses tonight... [bee in the back] AW HELL YEAH
@Flykins: regardless means without regard irregardless means the same as regardless except you never had any English classes
@AndyAsAdjective: COWORKER: big weekend plans? ME: fulfilling the blood prophecy…you? CW: what? M: what? CW: did you say- M: neighborhood barbecue, yes
@garyfromteenmom: [first date] ok dont let them know i stalked them online them: my aunt-- me: theresa or sharon