@RuthDavidsonMSP: Obviously, it would be hugely childish & wrong to chuckle at Linus & Florian, the backbone of Germany's hockey team.
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@koala_hugs: a gymnast walks into a bar. she is immediately given a 0.0 and disqualified from Olympic trials. you're supposed to jump OVER the bar, idiot
@BrettDruck: I posted "I did it!!!" to Facebook and got a ton of congratulations but nobody realized I was confessing.
@DurtMcHurtt: Your helium addiction is out of control, but nobody is taking your cry for help seriously.