@SoldHerSoul: Offering the floral arrangement as a meal to the gluten free, lactose intolerant, allergy ridden vegetarian is apparently not ok.
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@BrianIncognito: I was dismissed from my responsibilities as church usher because I kept using finger guns to point out available seats. * pew pew *
@SadPeruna: Sorry about your lost dog. If you liked it, then you should've put a leash on it. If you liked it, then you should've put a leash on it.
@CuppleOthoughts: Biden: We need theme music when we walk into a room Obama: Joe be professional Biden: STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON, CRAZY MOTHER- #BidenMemes
@Fred_Delicious: [Girlfriend looks at me in disgust] "Did u just propose using emojis?" ... "Technically its called a propoji, but yes" [She's already gone]