@fillthevacuum: "Ohhh, that's what you meant by period sex" I say, removing my powdered wig and waistcoat.
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@redpawn3: I could totally handle twins, triplets even quadruplets. Hold it, you're talking about BABIES?
@corysnearowski: My girlfriend broke up with me. I am devastated. How could you. I did everything. I surprised you with burgers every night
@SortaBad: "Mind control agents in chem trails sounds crazy? That's EXACTLY what the govt wants" Bride: I shouldn't have let you write your own vows
@ricsem: I wouldn't want to fly Virgin. Who'd want to fly an airline that doesn't go all the way?