@fillthevacuum: "Ohhh, that's what you meant by period sex" I say, removing my powdered wig and waistcoat.
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@AaronFullerton: "What are you doing? Are you writing down everything I'm saying?! IS THIS GONNA BE A SONG?!?!" -anyone dating Taylor Swift
@AndyAsAdjective: my dance moves can best be described as "did that dude just try to leap frog?" & "whoa that's a lot of blood" & "is he still alive?"
@TrainedHedonist: We're out of duct tape, craft glue, and frozen orange juice because I made a sandwich while I was drunk last night.