@Brentweets: On my tax form I checked the single box but added "and looking".
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@SortaBad: ATTENTION: Can the owner of the 'MarioKart Champion' tshirt return to security? There are several women here who'd like to have sex with you
@robfee: I wonder if the coach of the opposing team on Air Bud got fired when he explained to the principal how a golden retriever outscored his team
@mrsmith196645: Guys, if your lady tells you she needs windshield wiper blades, SHE DOES NOT MEAN FOR CHRISTMAS!
@theshantilly: Him: I wanna be the man you fell in love with all those years ago. Me: You wanna be Ryan Reynolds?