@shannonjrox: One minute without you feels like 60 seconds.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AnitaHelmet: I have a thing for older men. Not cuz I have 'daddy issues', but because I also like to eat dinner at 4:30 and be asleep by 8pm.
@squirrel74wkgn: [in bathroom stall] Me: ... Guy: ...most people wait their turn outside of the stall
@emmatheist: Before I die, I'm putting fake treasure maps behind all my picture frames. My grand children will be so pwned.