@alldrolledup: One of my favorite things about kids is that you only have to feed them once a week
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@SatansTongue: *Meninist meeting* WOMEN ARE EVIL- *phone rings* Uhh just a second... *picks up phone* Mom not while I'm doing my club! Yes, pizza tonight.
@funnybeachgirl: "I'M NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS!!!" (Seductively takes baby dragon out of Gucci purse & lights cigarette.)
@MatCro: IAN: Just how do fleas jump so high? ME: Your guess is as good as mine I: I reckon they wear tiny tiny Air Jordans M: Ok I take that back