@birbigs: One way to tell if what you're watching isn't really news is if the person is shouting at you.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@theshamingofjay: I can't go to sleep if any of my apps need to be updated, but will drive my car with the check engine light until it explodes
@envydatropic: So many people say "if my memory serves me correctly" and I'm actually quite shocked at the amount of servants named Memory.......
@dumbbeezie: Me: What are the lyrics to every 80s sitcom I've ever seen Brain: Coming right up Me: Remember to pay that bill Brain: Nope
@IamEnidColeslaw: ALL THE JADED LADIES all the jaded ladies ALL THE JADED LADIES all the jaded ladies