@torrami: Our wifi is down and I had to fap using only my imagination like some kind of savage :(
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@bingowings14: Jesus: Listen guys, why has someone written 'nail appointment' in my diary? Judas: No idea, J. No idea.
@onion_an: Son: Dad can sand melt? Me putting down my glass: Don't be ridiculous of course it can't
@Ndeshi_M: My dad is Jamaican and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most of our family holidays in Customs.