@IamJackBoot: I was raised by pirates. We suffered from scurvy. I finally ran away to join the citrus.
@roxiqt: There is no casual way to ask someone to move in with you. It's a very big step in any relationship. It takes careful planning & excellent timing to figure out how to approach that conversation. That said, it's not impossible to lure a raccoon into your home. In this essay,
@UnfilteredMama: We’re currently showing our home & still living there.
My husband hid the popcorn maker in the oven to make the kitchen look “cleaner.”
I preheated the oven to make dinner.
We’re going to be arguing about this for awhile.
@SortaBad: "So it's agreed? If we're both single at age 40 we're doing this?"
Yes. If we're alone at 40, we're getting matching racecar beds
@Aikiwomannc: Son: Dad is it true you named us after things you saw in the yard?
Dad: Yes we did, Hawk.
Grill: You could have looked around a bit.
@Browtweaten: *Riding around with my Abraham Lincoln clone*
Lincoln: *spots a "Children At Play" sign* WE HAVE TO SAVE THEM
@Crigmaster: So, when you have a missing sock, how long do you hang onto its partner? 9-10 years?