@NotJPo: Pantibros before pantihose?
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@paperphotoyo: When a man falls asleep next to me, I like to sniff his arm pit. Then he usually gets mad, I have to ride a different bus, it's a big mess.
@WheelTod: My wife says I've placed unreasonable expectations on our kids, but I think Superman and Wolverine will turn out just fine.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: A coworker just asked me how I stay so thin so I responded "I don't post pictures of my food online" and I think she believed me.