@JasonLastname: Parkour or plastic? *bounces away with your groceries*
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@3BlindMike: The cat puked all over the bath mat so I just tossed it into the trash can. Then I put the bath mat in the washer.
@Julescoop: The real power of a man... Is the size of the smile on his woman's face sitting next to him.
@TheDarkSideCEO: Optimistic Thought of the Day: You are always 1/3 of the way towards having a threesome.
@notalogin: God never gives you more than you can handle. But I'm not God. I'm just a bag boy. And you'll wanna take these groceries out in the cart.