@imdaintyaf: People complain when my baby is crying and then they complain when I stuff her in the overhead bin, MAKE UP YOUR GD MINDS
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@AnitaHelmet: I just want to apologize to all the guys I dated BEFORE I started using Prozac. And to their wives. And their local fire departments.
@Tmoney68: Mistletoe is my favorite Christmas tradition that sounds like a cool as shit superpower.