@inigoomontoya: People don't really care who you are until you lick their face
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@markleggett: A celebrity died? Better take this opportunity to tell everyone a very personal story about that one time you saw them eating falafel.
@Pundamentalism: My girlfriend asked me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.
@SortaBad: Why are you breaking up with me? "You treat your dog like a baby. It's weird" Shh *puts hands over dog's ears* he's 26 months he understands