@brendohare: People keep coming up to me & saying "You have the right amount of hair my son." Is this normal? Does anyone else have this problem? Hello??
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Pro_Jones_: Kids: *jumping on me* WAKE UP Me: I'm woke Kids: How woke? Me: We're putting Harriet Tubman on something that enslaves us all today.
@MatCro: [battle] ME: It's no good. We gotta quit SARGE: Quit? I don't know the meaning of the word M: It means give up S: Oh cool. Lets do that
@TheRolo: I almost got ran over by joggers. I saved myself by pretending to be a stop light. I got away while they jogged in place.
@Jesssicle: *brushes teeth for seventeen hours straight before dentist appointment* "Jessica, there is an entire Oreo behind your second molar."