@KayRants: People that live in glass houses have tons of dead birds on their lawn.
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@chrisanna4real: Ever since Crystal signed my yearbook in 4th grade, all of my summers have been rad and I haven't changed, just like she asked.
@sixfootcandy: Not to brag, but my antics at work resulted in several items being added to the employee manual.
@Crunk_Jews: Dear Autocorrect, She's an amazing woman not an amazon woman. Thanks. And now I'm never getting laid.
@daemonic3: They say New Zealand has a sheep population of over 60 million How did they stay awake to figure THAT one out?