@GrumpyBahr: People who eat hotdogs from a gas station, you know there's faster ways to commit suicide?
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@SINGING_GHOSTS: i imagine my dog spends a lot of time thinking about how tall i am and how great it is to have a giant as a best friend who can reach treats
@thepunningman: I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions.
@DadandBuried: You'll never know how creative you really are until you need to start lying to your kids.