@NickC46: People who use the wrong words sometimes should have the humidity to admit it.
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@Mikecanrant: In my most recent study, Ive found that saying "I'll have a chicken pot pie, extra pot" to KFC employees gets a laugh 4 out of 10 times.
@ArfMeasures: [park] STRANGER: Your dog is unusual looking ME: Yeah, he's interbred DUCK: [waddles up] I'll tell you who else is into bread
@FullMetalMommy: Chin up divorced people; lots of us smug married parents envy your 50/50 custody agreement.
@Owl_Meat: [highspeed chase] ANCIENT GREEK COP: Damn they're getting away *turns on Siren* [several nearby ships are lured to their doom]