@robdelaney: Peter Jackson just found a postcard JRR Tolkien wrote his nephew in 1938. He's turning it into 22 nine-hour films.
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@AlexRogaski: Biologist screws up: Mutant killer virus Physicist screws up: Deadly black hole Geologist screws up: Rock on table is now rock on floor
@DirtMcTurd: [Giraffes at gym] "What do you want to work on today?" Well we did neck day yesterday, and the day before. "So...neck day again" You bet
@sarcasm_inc: Me: I'm hot blooded check it and see got a fever of 103! 911: Did u call earlier about having a bad case of loving me? M: maybe 911: stop