@jonnysun: phd thesis: the amoumt of property damage depicted in a action movie is directley proportional to its budget
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@RoosterMustache: *i sneeze* Atheist: bless u Me: ha! i caught u Atheist: no its just like, an expression Me:*grabbing him by shoulders* u believe in god
@NikkiGlaser: What if ISIS started claiming responsibility for nice things like when my mom says, "who emptied the dishwasher?!"
@evanrhorne: I quit my job today!! The money from that Nigerian king arrives tomorrow, I'm so excited.