@hazelmotes1: Pink Camouflage: for when you go pheasant hunting on the old cotton candy plantation.
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@WonderMonkey78: I love it when all my iPhone apps tremble in fear when I'm about to delete one of them. Makes me feel like God.
@Brampersandon_: *takes bite of cookie* Aw man this is awful *takes another bite* Still bad. But I better eat the rest to see if it gets better
@JaneBadall: My son just paced back and forth dictating his letter to Santa like a high-powered CEO. Forget Prada, the Devil wears Ironman pyjamas.
@DeanB15: I got drunk with my dad once and I asked him if his boner curved to the left too, he replied "No, you got that from your mother". :(