@Bearslietoo: Playing hard to get works with some men but apparently cops call it "resisting arrest."
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@BuckyIsotope: ME: *3D prints a girlfriend* Hey baby 3D Girlfriend: *3D prints a boyfriend* I have a boyfriend
@petemandik: Scientists report global context shortage. "I guess I'll have flan," some scientist said, totally out of context.
@yenniwhite: Goals for my kids before I had them: teach them Spanish, only use positive reinforcement, never yell. After: get them to put on pants.