@Rollinintheseat: Please, keep trying unsuccessfully to suck the snot back up in your nose instead of using a tissue. Everyone loves the noise you're making.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Contwixt: Went to get coffee for a coworker. I effed up the order, but used it as a teaching opportunity to illustrate the dangers of outsourcing.
@badbanana: "And to my son Ronald, I leave my entire collection of mint-condition, never-been-opened LinkedIn Updates emails."
@Dmvm1977: When I get home to find my wife naked in the tub, seductively asking me to "warm her up", I dont waste a second.. to throw in a hairdryer