@Rollinintheseat: Please, keep trying unsuccessfully to suck the snot back up in your nose instead of using a tissue. Everyone loves the noise you're making.
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@MUMSIEesq: Pro Tip: If you knock on the door to a bathroom stall and someone says "one second," wait more than one second before entering.
@Vivalazoso: The only thing keeping me from cutting eye holes in a newspaper to spy on people in the coffee shop is my constant lack of scissors.