@Ygrene: "Please refrain, Angry God, from using the Newspaper of Doom" the Spider King cries as he orders another sacrifice into your sleeping mouth
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@StevieKnip: [accidentally hits Siri in high school classroom] Siri: what can I do for you, #1 God of Sex? [every boy in the class checks their phone]
@gamecox93: Now that I have an adult coloring book, most arguments with my 3 yr old are over fridge space.