@seejaylinco: please stop asking me to change my password, i'm getting tired of renaming my cat all the time
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@Owl_Meat: *puts bread in toaster* hmm something strange about the toaster today Duck(from in toaster): no there isnt
@msgwenl: The thing about eating broken cookies is there's no way to know how many you had. "You ate the whole ba-" THERE'S NO WAY TO KNOW.
@Marlebean: Friend zone?! I've been sister zoned! And if one more dude pats me on the head, I'm telling mom!!
@NotKarma: Cops don't like it when you ask them "Need some help?" especially when you're wearing a Batman costume.