@chanelpuke: Ppl who make fun of outfit repeating? I look bomb af so I'm gonna wear this again I'll even wear it to your funeral if you keep talking shit
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@JoeMande: "Make it look like I live in a Cheesecake Factory." - NBA players to their interior designers
@curlycomedy: You never see baby pigeons because pigeons are cloned by the government. Next question.
@theshantilly: Non-tweeting friend: "So it's like FB?" Me: "Except everyone's mean & sarcastic & brutally honest." "Sounds awf..." "Awesome. I know."
@Mindless4Miles: I ducked into a crowd of guys bro hugging as they left the bar, they didn't notice the stranger in their midst and I'm feeling so loved rn.