@hpb777: Pretty cool how the universe lets me know I'll be bumping into my ex by making me spill coffee on my shirt.
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@plank_sinatra: My parents are pretty middle aged. "So? That's pretty norm-" *two knights bust in* "CHILD, DOST THOU REQUEST REFRESHMENTS FROM THE TAVERN?"
@SoulYodeler: It takes a big man to admit his mistakes. It takes a bigger man to fix them. It takes an enormous man to close down a Chinese buffet. High-5
@omically: "Gary give me the gun" "I thought you had it" "I TOLD you to bring it" "I didn't" "who brought the getaway car?" -Disorganized crime