@therepoguy: Pretty sure my refrigerator is having sex with itself from all the noises its making.
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@Di0nysus7: He asked what I like in bed so I was honest: 1. My dog 2. iPhone 3. Blankets fresh from the dryer 4. Take out
@chuuew: ME: I'm as strong as a box! HER: Surely you mean "ox"? ME: [easily collapses after getting wet from tears]
@ProdigyNelson: "WHAT DO WE WANT?" "A BETTER STRUCTURE FOR MEASUREMENT OF TIME THAT ISN'T AN ILLUSION CREATED BY MAN" "WHEN DO WE WANT IT?" ... "shit"