@heymonroe: Pretty sure nobody would run marathons if they were never allowed to talk about running marathons.
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@MatCro: SON: How are monster trucks made? ME: Son, when a monster and a truck love each oth- GF: [glares] ME: He's old enough for the facts, Jane
@WeissBrandon: When I ask my wife if she wants help, she changes the subject and asks if a bear shits in the woods, like I'm some sort of bear scientist.