@Mikecanrant: Pretty upset to find out that salmonella poisoning has nothing to do with a vindictive fish named Ella.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@haleysfalling: so people are okay with batman wearing a cape but when i do it i "need to put my hospital gown on the right way"
@UnFitz: A first kiss so tentative and awkward, you regret all the time you spent practicing on your beagle. Did I just say that out loud?
@onion_an: [at restaurant] Me: "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse" Wife: "I'm the same" Horse family at next table: *just sitting very still*
@NolaChef504: When my boss is mad and takes it out on me, I do less work. Can't reward bad behavior with a positive response. Training works both ways