@leifromloihi: [pulls away from kissing] do you ever pretend nfl players with dreadlocks swinging around under their helmets are predators
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AndyAsAdjective: "any ideas?" let's tie a bunch of helium balloons together & then hold onto the strings "whoa whoa whoa, let's not get carried away"
@batkaren: [finding a secret passage in my NYC-apartment that leads to a corpse-filled torture dungeon] HOLY SHIT LOOK AT ALL THIS EXTRA SPACE I HAVE!
@LurkAtHomeMom: If you haven't told your kids that wine is made out of whiny children then congratulations I guess you're a better parent than me.